First Draft Doubts

The short story now consists of more than one sentence. It’s up to a whopping 375 words. And just about all of them suck.

Is there a writer out there who truly believes their first drafts contain even a glimmer of brilliance? Most of us…at least those I know…despise the words we put on the page during the draft stage. The only thing we despise more is a blank page. So I wrote a little over 300 lousy words yesterday. The page is no longer blank.

The short story came up at the end of the to-do list. After working on the conference. After blogging. After recording several months of gas receipts. Perhaps I should have worked on the short story first.

I usually like to do my creative writing first thing after breakfast, when the caffeine has kicked in. That seems to be when the creative energies are at high tide. But when I have an excessively long list of things I HAVE to do or NEED to do or SHOULD do, the writing always seems to get put off.

Maybe that’s why what I wrote yesterday is so awful. Or maybe it’s just the normal first draft drivel. Or maybe I’m a crappy writer and should just get a real job.

Ah, the joys of being a writer. Self-doubt followed by self-loathing followed by the realization that I have no control over it. I am a writer. I may not be making much money at it, but it’s in my blood and I have no choice over the matter. I must write.

Plus there’s always the hope that what I write today will be nothing short of genius.

Stop laughing!


Joyce said…
Or maybe you're just being too hard on yourself and what you've written is really brilliant!
Annette said…
Joyce, what I wrote yesterday was not even CLOSE to brilliant. A diamond in the rough? Maybe. But lots of polishing is in my future.

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